Connecting with your daughter: Mother/Daughter Journals

by Donna

I’m a mom of two little girls, 6 and 8. I was very close to my mom, and I hope to share a similar relationship with my girls. I read about Mother/Daughter journals somewhere online a while back, and the concept really appealed to me. As an historian by training, the thought of having a record of communication between my girls and I was instantly attractive. Also, as someone whose own mom passed away too soon, I would love to have such a keepsake.  So, one day at Chapters last summer I picked up a few pretty paper journals and tucked them away. I decided to pull one out this fall and wrote my daughter a short letter, and tucked it under her pillow.  I explained to my daughter that she could write back when she wanted, and could leave it in under my pillow for me to find.

My daughter seemed rather tickled about the process.  She asked me lots of questions: “Can I write about anything I want?” (Yes!); “Can I write whenever I want?” (Take your time!); “Do I have to tell you my secrets? (Only if you want to!); “Should I tell my sister?” (Let’s keep this between the two of us. She’ll get a journal when she’s older).

And then I waited.

And waited.

Weeks, a month rolled by. But one night, my husband and I went out for an evening. When I came up to bed, I noticed the journal peeking out. I was thrilled.  (I may have cried!) It worked. The journal has gone back and forth several times now, and my youngest asked last month if she could have one of her own (her older sister broke one day and spilled the beans). Entries from my youngest have been pretty basic as her literacy skills are still pretty rudimentary – but what great incentive to read and write! While the entries by my oldest have been mostly focused on discussions of Harry Potter, it is my hope that:

• The journal will provide a space to talk about potentially difficult topics.
• The journal will  let me into their quirky little minds (this is already happening – their observations of things make me smile)
• Writing in a journal will give them an opportunity to ask me questions about myself (how I wish I had the opportunity to do so with my own mom)
• ·We’ll have fun and strengthen our bond.

I wrote about the mother daughter journal concept in a facebook comment and it sparked a fair bit of interest. I’m eager to keep at it and see where it takes my girls and I. Maybe you’ll give it a try!

Let us know in the comments if you'd try anything like this or if you will!

Managing your child's iPod use with OurPact

by Eric

For his birthday last September, our eight year old asked for an iPod Touch. He’s been in his room ever since.

But seriously, when he got the iPod, we were able to set up a childrens’ account through Family Sharing in iOS8, which makes it so he can’t purchase new apps without first getting approved. We used Restrictions to turn off Safari and In-App purchases and tried to make it as safe an environment as possible.

After seeing how his parents have a tendency to be glued to their own devices, it shouldn’t have surprised us when he disappeared into his room and didn’t come out unless summoned. I looked into the different parenting apps and discovered:

• An app that filled the screen with an alert that couldn’t be turned off until usage was allowed again (unless you reset the phone and didn’t load that app)
• An app that used a VPN to allow you to monitor and block your child’s usage from your phone (except if the phone went to sleep, then when it was turned on again the VPN was disabled)
• An app that produced an alarm that reminded him that it was time to turn off the phone (which, after hitting OK let him ignore and continue playing)

Finally, an actual useful solution was found - the OurPact app for iDevices (Android development is currently ongoing).

OurPact is an app you install on your device to schedule app usage on your children’s devices. Once I set up an account in the app, I was able to pair my son’s iPod to it and set up schedules where the device is blocked – where all non-Apple installed apps are turned off.

Additionally we have the ability to grant access remotely during these blocked hours (“Your homework is done early? Okay, you can have fifteen minutes of apps”) and block apps when they’re not (“Why can't he hear me calling? He’ll certainly hear me now…” – blocks apps –  “Oh, hi there.”).

You can even add multiple iDevices to monitor, which we did when I got a new phone and the younger siblings inherited my old one.

The only downsides we’ve noticed are that there isn’t yet the ability to give a daily allowance of hours and there’s no ability to block only certain apps – though we’ve been told those features are in development in future versions of the app.

OurPact is free for iOs and has been a nice way for us to help manage device usage in our home.

5 Tips for Being an Anglophone in a Francophone System

Choosing a school for your child is a difficult decision, and many parents agonize for months over the various choices. Catholic or public? Alternative or mainstream? Walking or driving to get there?

Here in Ottawa we have an added layer to the decision - language. We are lucky to live in a fully bilingual city, with Quebec a stone's throw away. But Ottawa is also a city where many anglophones move to for jobs, and we often assume that French schools are not accessible to us.

It's true that if you are fully anglophone (i.e. you do not speak any French), then French Immersion would be a better choice if you want your child to learn French as a second language. But many of us have been through the French Immersion system ourselves - we speak French, want to immerse ourselves in Franco-Ontarian culture, and hope our children will be fully bilingual.

If that's the case, then choosing a French school is an option! Here are 5 tips for being an anglophone in a francophone system:

Assess your own level of French

Are you comfortable reading and speaking in French? Remember that accommodations will not be made for you - all materials sent home from schools will be in French, and you will be expected to speak to your child's teachers in French (that said, my husband doesn't speak French, and we've had some very kind teachers who will switch to English for him when necessary)

Be brave! 

I was so nervous when I first called the principal to discuss the possibility of my daughter attending French school. But as soon as I began speaking in French, the principal said I would be completely fine and reassured me that my French was actually better than I thought! If your French is not as advanced, you may be asked to have an interview with both the principal and supervisor. In my case, I was able to meet with the principal alone.

Don't expect the school to "make" your child bilingual 

You have a responsibility as a parent to also introduce French at home. Although English is my mother tongue, I make an effort to read French books, sing French songs, turn on French TV or DVDs and sign my child up for French playgroups/camps. We are also lucky to have preparatory programs in our schools: Je d'ecole and Petits pas a trois. These programs are suitable for children as young as 3 years old and are FREE!

Get involved 

The best way to ensure your child has a positive experience in French school is to get involved as a parent. Volunteer on the school council, or attend class outings. If you stay at home with your children, consider volunteering in the classroom once a week.

Speak French! 

Duh. Seems obvious, but we anglophones have a tendency to revert to English because we are worried about how we sound. But tell me this - have you ever judged another person who is speaking in English as their second language? Of course not! And francophones are often happy to let us speak our choppy French so that we can learn. If you're still feeling nervous, consider signing up for a conversational French class.

For more information, contact your French school boards:

Conseil des ecoles catholiques du centre-est

Conseil des ecoles publiques de l'Est de l'Ontario

Worth a Visit: Cumberland Nature Trails

It's our weekly "Worth a Visit" series! Have an idea you'd like to submit? The only requirements are that it must be in the Ottawa region and kid-friendly! Email Misty at kidsinthecapital@gmail.com

When you have a favourite place you like to go, it's normal to want to keep it a secret. That's just how I feel about the Cumberland Nature Trails - if I tell everyone about this walkable ravine, swarms of people will descend on my piece of peace. Quelle horreur!

But alas, I can not stay quiet about the importance of getting out in nature (you've heard this before, right?) And if you are knocking about the bedroom community of Orleans, you must spend some time on these trails. Why drive a long distance for a hike when there's a great hill right in your backyard?

Our family photos with Sara McConnell Photography - located along one of the trails

And some of these trails are actually IN my backyard - our home in Queenswood Heights backs onto the ravine. We have been walking these trails with our doggy and kids for many years now, and have seen the landscape change a lot. The trails, which run over a big bed of limestone and thick clay, are prone to landslides - as we have seen evidence of while using the paths. One of our favourite trails along a creek-bed is now completely covered in landslide debris (makes me slightly nervous that my house may one day slide down there!)

We have seen evidence of beavers in the area, and have spotted rabbits, fox, snowy owls and pileated woodpeckers. A well-established honey bee hive lives in one of the trees behind our house, and we love watching them buzzing around all spring and summer. Your kids will have a blast mucking through the trails.

For those planning to check out the trails, you can see maps at the Queenswood Heights Community Centre. Call first before heading over there, as their offices are only open at certain hours: 613-580-2424 (maps are not necessary though - if you get lost, it's very easy to find your way up to the neighbourhoods above!)

Also, please remember to be kind to nature! Stay on the paths, don't pick or trample the plants (you may end up with poison ivy), and make sure your teenagers aren't down there lighting fires ;) Oh, and poop 'n scoop for those doggies!!

Kidsfest Giveaway!!

We are excited to announce that for the second year in a row, Kids in the Capital will be offering a family pack of 4 tickets to Kidsfest! As well as the giveaway here on the blog, we'll also be giving away 4 tickets on our Facebook Page.

Kidsfest is an annual show/exhibition at the Ernst & Young Centre here in Ottawa. The show this year will take place on April 11th and 12th, from 9am to 5pm.

Performers this year will include Junkyard Symphony, The Puppet Tamer, Mini TFO, and Splash 'n Boots. Children will also get a chance to meet Peppa Pig, and the big list of exhibits! 

To enter, simply comment below and tell us who your child will be excited to see! And to double your chances of winning, visit our Facebook page and enter again! Please make sure you are able to attend the show on April 11th and 12th before entering. Contest ends Wednesday April 8th at noon EST.